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You have sometimes heard it said
of people that "they have to be handled like eggs"; eggs
must be handled carefully; or you are likely to break
them. Some people are super-sensitive: you have to be
very careful what you do or say, or they will be hurt or
offended; you can never be sure how they are going to
take anything. Such people are much of the time
suffering from wounded feelings, are displeased and
offended. It is true that some are of a highly nervous
temperament and naturally feel things more keenly than
others, but it is not this natural nervous sensitiveness
that leads to the results above mentioned, it is a
morbid and unnatural state into which people allow
themselves to enter. The natural feelings may need
restraint and careful cultivation, but these morbid
feelings need to be got rid of.
Sometimes people can bear to hear
others ridiculed or talked about in a gossiping way, or
see them slighted, and think nothing of it or even be
amused; but when they themselves become the target for
such things, it almost kills them, or at least they feel
almost killed. What makes this great difference in their
feelings? Why do they feel for themselves so much more
than they do for others? Trace the feeling back to its
origin, and you will find that their self-love is the
thing that has been hurt. If they loved others as they
love themselves, they would feel just as much hurt by
that which was directed againts the other as by that
which was directed at themselves. It is self-love that
makes people easily offended and easily wounded; and the
more self-love they have, the easier they are hurt and
the quickier their resentment is aroused. Self-love
begets vanity; it quivers in keenest anguish at a sneer
or a scornful smile; it is distressed by even a fancied
slight. Self-love throws the nerves of sensation all out
to the surface and makes them hyper-sensitive, and so
the person feels everything keenly. He is constantly
smarting under a sense of injustice. He feels he is
constantly being mistreated.
Oh, this self-love! How many pains
it brings! how many slight it sees! how often it is
offended! Reader, are you a victim of self-love? If you
are so sensitive, always being wounded and offended,
self-love is what is the trouble. If you will get rid of
this self-love, you will be rid of that morbid
sensitiveness that makes people have to be so careful
with you.
Self-love makes a person wonder
what others are thinking and saying about him. It makes
him suspicious of others, suspicious that they are
saying or thinking things that would hurt his feelings
if known. If two others talk in his presence and he can
not hear what is said, he is afraid lest the talk is
about him or he is hurt because he is not taken into the
confidence of others. If others are invited to take part
in something while he is omitted, he feels slighted and
hurt, and can hardly get over it. I have often heard
people make remarks like this: "We shall have to invite
So-and-so, or he will feel hurt," Self-love is a tender
plant; it is easily injured. We may make all sorts of
excuses for such sensitieveness; but if we will clear
away these excuses and dig down to the root oooof the
trouble, we shall find that God has it labeled "self
love."
Another thing that increases
sensitiveness is holding a wrong mental attitude toward
others. This attitude manifest itself in a lack of
confidence in the good intent of others. If we are
looking for and expecting slights, ridicule, and like
things, it means we take it for granted that others are
holding a wrong attitude toward us. We do not really
believe that they love us and have kindly feelings
towards us, or that they will be just and kind and
sympathetic in their actions that affects us or relate
to us. Have you not seen children who, when one would
hurt another and say, "Oh, I did not mean to do it!" the
other would retort, "Yes you did; you just did it on
purpose"? There are many older persons who are always
ready to say, "It was just done on purpose; they just
meant to hurt my feelings!" This is childish, but alas,
how many professed Christians hold such an attitude!
This is a sure way to destroy fellowshhip and to take
sweetness out of the association with God's people. It
is unjust to our brethren. It is the foe of unity and
spirituality. Were it not for self-love, we would not
think of attributing to others an attitude different
from that which we feel that we ourselves hold toward
them.
This self-love crops out in all
relations. It constantly exalts us and as constantly
depreciates our brethren. God's saints are animated with
a spirit of kindness and brotherly affection for each
other, and this does not manifest itself in wounds and
slights, and if we are looking for such manifestation it
is because we do not believe that they have Christlike
feelings towards us. God wants us to have more
confidence in our brethren than to be looking for them
to misuse us.
If we are looking for slights, we
shall see plenty of them--even where none exist. If we
are expecting wounds, we shall receive them even when no
one intends to wound us. Self-love has a great
imagination. It can see a great many evils where none
exist. It is like a petulant and spoiled child. I
remember one child of whom it was said, "If you just
crook your finger at him, he will cry." Thinking that
this was an exaggeration, I tried it, and the boy cried.
There are some people six feet tall who are hurt just
that easily. They are truly "lovers of their own
selves." Paul said, "When I became a man, I put away
childish things." It is high time others were doing the
samething. Suppose Christ had been as sensitive as you
are, would he saved the world? If Paul had been like
you, would he have endured the persecution and dangers
and tribulations and misrepresentation that he bore to
carry the gospel to world? He was not not so sensitive.
He was not looking for slights. He was a real, full
sized man for God. The secret is that he loved Christ
and others more than he loved himself; therefore he
could endure all things for his brethren's sake, that
they might be saved.
The cure for self-love and the
sensitiveness that comes from it is to turn away your
eyes from self to Jesus Christ, and look upon him until
you see how little and insignificant you and your
interest really are. Look upon him until you see how
high above all such narrow pettishness he was, until you
see that his great heart was so overrunning with love
for others that he had no time to think of himself. Then
ask him to revolutionize you and fill your heart with
that same love till your eyes and your thoughts and your
interest are no longer centered upon yourself, and self
no longer fills your horizon, but your heart goes out to
others till it quite draws you away from yourself. You
will find this the cure for your sensitiveness; and when
you are thus cured, you will no longer be an egg-shell
Christian, and people will no longer have to be afraid
of wounding or offending you.


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